Shopping at The Gap

Honolulu, Hawaii–I bought two shirts at The Gap today. I didn’t see any angry young protesters blockading the entrance, so I went right in and instantly spotted a shirt sale and made a purchase.

I am beaming proud of my purchases. By buying these two shirts, I am defying those picketing neo-hippie protesters who want to destroy our local garment industry. Not only that: I am also supporting the American economy and helping to provide jobs for thousands of impoverished textile workers abroad.

One of the shirts I bought, for example, was made in Sri Lanka, which is right below India. The minimum wage there–assuming they even have one–must be extremely low. I imagine the Sri Lankan unemployment rate must be fairly high. Sri Lanka certainly qualifies as a poor country.

It therefore gives me great pleasure to know that I have directly contributed to the war-ravaged Sri Lankan economy. Because of my patronage, some poor Sri Lankan citizen had a job to do–and wages to earn.

True, the Sri Lankan garment factory worker may not earn very much, but at least he has a job to do–and a little money is better than no money at all.

The other shirt I bought was from Madagascar, right off the southern coast of Africa. Madagascar also happens to be a poor country with low wages. Any export it can make to the US market, textile or otherwise, undoubtedly serves to alleviate local stringencies.

The Gap is clearly supporting other peoples abroad, including the mainland Chinese workers staffing our OSHA inspected garment factories. The Gap is providing productive foreign jobs where foreign aid once prevailed. And it is doing so at no expense to the American worker (lost jobs) or taxpayer (foreign aid). The American unemployment rate is now lower than Japan’s. At 4.4 percent, America is at full employment–at the lowest rate in nearly three decades.

The shirts I bought helped to employ the American sales attendant who got me the right size: extra large. They helped to employ the fitting room attendant, who handled the clothes I eventually discarded. They helped to support the profits of an American retail clothing company, with shareholders and tax collectors.

Shopping at The Gap is a win-win situation for virtually everyone involved. The foreign textile worker gets a job and earns some wages. The American consumer gets a good product at reasonable cost; inflation is subdued. The retailer gets a profit for its shareholders. The tax collector gets his loot. American citizens, from retail sales staff to shipping men, find employment. America continues along with full employment. CNMI OSHA inspectors have something to do, and the liberal care creeps get to put on their ridiculous side shows in San Francisco.

Shop at The Gap.