Disturbing social proofs

“Where are you going, Charles?” asked a young woman of my acquaintance.

I told her that I was going to watch a movie. She seemed strangely surprised by this report.

“By yourself?” she asked, rather incredulously (in some disbelief). “All by yourself?”

Yes, by myself. This may seem bizarre to some, but I usually watch films by myself. After all, it is not as if I needed to bring along a companion for some assistance. I am about to see a picture show, not play tennis. I don’t need any help, or some other person to justify my activity.

Yet that was precisely what this young lady had expected: the company of some other person to fully justify one’s activities. In fact, she was so distraught by my peculiar response that she even offered to go with me some time in the future.

This was not the first time I encountered such a peculiar social phenomena. In an earlier incident, a friend asked me, “Where have you been?” And when I told him that I had just had a meal at a restaurant, he expressed some surprise that I actually had the audacity to dine alone in a public restaurant. My friend sort of acted as if I were some kind of a weirdo.

Personally, I think that many of my collectivist, group-oriented friends are the true weirdoes, while I remain the rational, rugged individualist oblivious to mob psychology.

To give you yet another odd example, about a year ago, I saw my little brother off at the Honolulu Airport. But before his flight departed, he decided to have lunch at one of the airport’s many snack bars. Naturally, he offered to buy me lunch as well, but I declined. I told him that I wasn’t hungry.

This time, to my great surprise, he almost refused to have lunch unless I agreed to join him in a meal. I almost couldn’t believe my little brother’s reaction. I told him I thought he was crazy–that he should eat if he was hungry, regardless of my participation. He shouldn’t care about me. He should look out for himself. He should do what is right for himself and not get all hung up on my personal involvement.

The lessons of this column are simple:

1.) If you want to watch a movie, go to the theater and watch the darn movie by yourself. There is no shame in it. To attach shame would be highly irrational. One’s life and activities need not be justified by the involvement of other parties.

2.) If you are hungry and wish to dine out, do so with or without the presence of other people. You don’t need another body to help you enjoy and digest your food.
Live for yourself. Look out for number one. Be rationally selfish and read Ayn Rand’s magnificent novels–the most liberating and intoxicating selections of great literature you will likely ever encounter.