Questions to discuss with your children

It is estimated that some parents spend less than fifteen minutes a week talking to their children including the time spent screaming at them for some offense. In the hope that a dialogue can be recreated between parents and children, I am writing several questions on various ethical points to discuss with your children. Hopefully they will also help you rethink ethical values that you should be teaching your children.

Respect:

4 to 8 year child: When you are playing at your best friend’s house, her mother always yells and is mean to you. What do you say? What do you do?

9 to 12 year child: You are a very good soccer player, but you spend most of your time sitting on the bench, while your coach plays teammates-especially his son and his friends-who are not as good as you. How do you convince the coach to give you the playing time you deserve?

Teenagers: Your history teacher is dull and boring, wears weird clothes, and has bad breath. Your friends are planning to harass the teacher by purposely misbehaving in class and by spreading rumors about her personal life. Do you participate in the “campaign” to get the teacher’? why? Why not? What do you say to your friends?

Honesty:

4 to 8 year child: Your teacher asks who spilled the juice during snack time. You did. Do you tell?

9 to 12 year child: You find five dollars in the sidewalk near school. What do you do with the money?

Teenagers: Your friend got a copy of the answers to the questions or tomorrow’s math test and offers to give them to you. Do you take them? Why? Why not? What do you say to your friend?

Fairness:

4 to 8 years old: When you are playing at recess, one of the kids keeps telling you that you aren’t being fair because you take too long a turn on the swings. What do you say? What do you do?

9 to 12 year child: Twelve pencils are missing from the supply cabinet in your classroom. Your teacher says that unless someone confesses to taking the pencils, everyone in the class will be punished. You know who took the pencils. What do you do?

Teenagers: Your best friend cheated on the written exam portion of the driving test-but he didn’t get caught, and he got his license. You are worried that his lack of knowledge of the rules of the road will endanger not only his safety, but the safety of others. What do you do?

Responsibility:

4 to 8 child: Your best friend doesn’t invite you to her birthday party. How do you feel? What do you say to your friend?

9 to 12 child: One of the kids in your class has to stay home from school for two weeks because he broke his leg. Even though you aren’t really friendly with him, he lives in your neighborhood. Your teacher asks you to bring him homework and explain the assignments to him- every day for two weeks. Do you agree to it? Why? Why not?

Teenagers: Members of a secret gang are terrorizing some of the younger kids at school-especially with threats of physical violence and the demand for payment of “protection money.” The kids who are threatened are really afraid and will not reveal the identify of the gang members. The school principal asks you and five of your friends to see if you can find out who the gang members are and to report their names to the authorities. Do you accept the principal’s request? Why? Why not? (Continued)

Strictly a personal view. Anthony Pellegrino writes every Monday and Tuesday. Mr. Pellegrino can be reached at tonypell@saipan.com