Living a purpose-driven life

She is single, is teaching child development, and very soon, will be teaching about parenting.

A graduate of BS Psychology from the University of Guam, Grace P. Sablan, 28, finds herself comfortable in teaching the subject, which is an elective course offered at Marianas High School.

“[Students] learn about the development stages of a child to adulthood. They learn about the birth process. I teach that, believe it or not,” she said. “I don’t think you’ve got to be a parent to talk and discuss about child development to young people,” she added.

Sablan has been teaching the course for nine months, and already she has had students asking questions about her own life.

Teenagers, she said, are so curious that they sometimes just ask without thinking. “I’ve been in that stage so I understand,” she said.

One time, she said, one of her students asked her a “challenging” question, which caught her off guard.

“I was in the middle of a lecture when a student asked, ‘So miss, have you had sex?’ I was kind of taken aback, but I answered. I said, no. They chorused, ‘No?’ Some of them said, ‘Wow’ and cheered. Some of them said, ‘Really?’ They are surprised when they see singles not having boyfriends or girlfriends and not having sex,” said Sablan.

She said this is partly due to society “that portrays sex that’s not necessarily for married people.”

“In their minds, sex can just be given to anyone, it’s okay to have sex with anybody as long as you like the person. They get that message from TV, magazines, the media or society in general,” she explained.

But she said there remains a good number of young people who keep their family values. “Some of my students come from traditional families. They are following their values,” she said.

Yet, she also observes that while the CNMI is predominantly Catholic, most young people who come from traditional families get pressured when they go outside their homes.

Personally, she concedes that being single is a “real challenge.”

“There are moments when you feel lonely. No one can deny that reality. Especially for women like us, it’s our human nature to be emotional. We are passionate. We want to be loved. Then you look around and find that your friends are married. Your family members have expectations of you, things like that,” relates Sablan.

But she has discovered that the key to overcoming her loneliness “is putting God in the picture.” “When I’m going through something, I open the Bible and I find encouragement from there,” she said.

But she said that she personally does not see herself getting married in her 20s. “I tell my friends. Wait until I get my Ph.D. but you know, it’s a joke,” she said.

Sablan said she appreciates the fact that child development and parenting are taught among young people.

She said the course is an important part of the curriculum since understanding one’s childhood is crucial to understanding one’s life.

“In order for you to understand your life in full picture as an adult, you need to look back to your childhood,” she said. It is during childhood that people set their foundation—their values and standards in life.

“Actually, with this course, I have to teach values, about family system. What’s a core value in raising a child. Basic things such as meeting people’s needs. Your parents give you clothes, but it just doesn’t end there. It goes to even your morals, your values,” she said.

Identity crisis among teenagers are common as they begin to ask bigger questions about life. Usually, this crisis begins in teenage years but the average age when people struggle in this area is 22.

“You’re looking at your teenage years and here’s what teenagers are supposed to be doing, then you hit 18 and you’re expected to be an adult already. At 20, there’s that ‘Do I wanna go to college? Am I going to settle down? What am I going to do? So at age 22, you’re still thinking, do I still want to have fun or do I want to be serious?” she said.

But she said that identity crisis actually varies with individuals. “There are some people who are in their 40s and they are still finding their true selves,” she said.

She defines identity crisis as “finding your true self.”

“You wonder what’s your purpose in life. What are you created for. You don’t know who you really are. You don’t know what’s your purpose in life. So I like this book, The Purpose-Driven Life by Rick Warren,” she said.

Sablan, whose father, Herman Deleon Guerrero Sablan, is a pastor in Pohnpei, said she finds peace and satisfaction in her personal relationship with God.

She was born and raised on Saipan, studied kindergarten and first grade in Pohnpei—the hometown of her mother Nadine Hadley Phillip—and came back to Saipan to finish her elementary and high school.

For two years after high school at MHS, she said she joined a mission team led by the Grace Christian Church on Rota. She then went to UOG to obtain a bachelor’s degree. Last year, she came back to Saipan “to give back to the community.”

She is an active member of the Life in the Son Christian Fellowship on Middle Road, where she is part of the church’s worship team and serves as children’s church coordinator.

“I believe my purpose in life is to be all that I can be that God has created me to be. That sounds a little cryptic but meaning, God created me in His image, right? I find my identity in God. I come from Him and I am for Him,” she said.

Some of the things that she would want to do is to have her own TV show that discusses issues of the youth. She also wants to take up and finish her MA very soon. She also wants to be a missionary one day.

“I see myself traveling and going to places. But in the meantime, I enjoy my work and would want to do more for others,” she said.

“It’s one thing I appreciate about being single. I can freely do so many things. I will enjoy my singlehood every minute because when I get married, it will be a totally different stage of life,” said Sablan.