Marriage tune-up

Well, it’s that time of the year again. The annual Marriage Encounter weekend is scheduled for October 21-23 right here on Saipan. This is one of the community’s annual highlights, as 25 couples spend a weekend together to strengthen their marriages and to focus on their relationship.

Marriage Encounter is open to anyone. According to the organization, the program “is designed to give married couples the opportunity to examine their lives together… a time to share their feelings, their hopes, disappointments, joys and frustrations… and to do so openly and honestly in a face-to face, heart-to-heart encounter with the one person they have chosen to live with for the rest of their life.”

The privacy of each couple is respected, and the weekend is organized such that everyone comes together to hear prepared presentations, then retreat to their rooms for private reflection and conversation between husband and wife.

The weekends here on Saipan are organized with the assistance of the Catholic Church; however, it is open to all, and a certain number of spaces are reserved each weekend for couples of other faiths.

I asked Sean and Barbara Maycock, who went through the weekend with us in 2003 to share their thoughts on the experience. Here’s what they had to say:

“Marriage Encounter really taught us to actively focus on making our marriage great. Like all good things, a good marriage takes effort, commitment and intentional action. Ever since we went to our Marriage Encounter we’ve been more intentional in our marriage and less inclined to take each other for granted. We’ve learned to communicate with each other more honestly, and to respect and value each other’s feelings. Before the weekend our marriage was ‘good enough’ but really, what is that? What is a ‘good enough’ marriage? Can’t it always be better? After the weekend we found that ‘good enough’ can be better.”

Russ and Kanae Quinn also offered this about their weekend:

“We attended the ME Weekend in April 2002. Although we felt our marriage was strong, our busy lifestyles prevented us from dedicating quality time to just ourselves. The weekend allowed us to prioritize our marriage and grow stronger as a couple. We learned to share our ideas, feelings and fears through newly acquired communication skills presented by the facilitators. The concepts that we learned at the weekend were invaluable and enriched our relationship. Even though we encounter our peaks and valleys as other couples do, we know that we possess the tools necessary to work together to continually strengthen our union. We’ve been married 13 years now and look forward to a lifetime of joyous moments.”

There is currently space available for only two more couples. A $50 registration fee confirms your participation, and at the end of the weekend each couple is given a blank envelope and asked to make a donation. The whole weekend, including lodging and meals can cost as little as $50 for those who cannot donate more.

Interested couples can call Rex and Clarie Kosack at 322-8800, Jess and Anicia Sonoda at 233-2600, or Charles and Cathy Cepeda at 288-7185.

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David Khorram, MD is a board certified ophthalmologist, and director of Marianas Eye Institute. Questions and comments are welcome. Call 235-9090 or email eye@vzpacifica.net. Copyright © 2005 David Khorram.