Baby, it must be Island Style!

We find every excuse in the book to party-up. It’s an expensive aspect of life in the islands. Never mind that the source is food stamps coupons, it’s party time, every time!

On the baby’s first birthday, it’s party time! He crawls, it’s party time! He takes his first toddler’s step, it’s party time! He grows his first set of baby teeth, it’s party time! He utters his first expletive, it’s party time!

Hold on, we’ll get to some more excuses for, well, party time! We go to work (and this is especially true of public sector employees), it’s party time at some coffee shop! We punch in for overtime after a whole day at coffee shops, it’s party time! We know we’ve screwed the taxpayers, it’s still party time!

We punch in at work and go fishing all day, it’s party time! A very distant relative dies, it’s party time! We sign for leave to help at the kitchen or something or other, it’s party time! This is the worse of parties in that it’s a grand excuse to take off from work. Meanwhile, your employer swallows every excuse thrown at him duped that it’s cultural or island style, baby. Woe!

Man, do we specialize in finding instant excuses to get out of responsibilities, huh?

At work, it’s party time at the expense of taxpayers, yeah? We punch in late (actually early by calling a co-worker to punch in our time cards) while we take our merry time at home. We get to work and begin the day gossiping with fellow co-workers. It’s party time!

It’s party time at the coffee pot, trips to offices and rest rooms, betel nut, nicotine fits, not to mention cruising on the public highways and other personal errands, yeah? To top it all off, we quietly stalk lawmakers to pass an appropriation bill for unearned salary raises at the expense of productive private sector employees. Woe!

We find other excuses, including white lies that we had to go to the hospital because grandpa or grandma or some grandparent is in his or her death bed. Well, this has got to be the grandest of party time excuse: Your employer can’t say no. Or if he or she did, there’s that guilty trip in the office all day while you smile because you had them duped. Ooops! Hold on, we’re still miles from the finish line.

Then there are the legal holidays, 14 for public sector employees, about 4 for private sector employees. We slave away while half the island gets to start barbecue fire to party up at the beach, backyard or the ranch. We ask ourselves “where’s justice?”–and answer it at the same time, “it’s for the royal misfits”. We definitely (private sector employees) lack the appropriate resumes` to fit the bill of “royal misfits”.

Eh, our list of party time ain’t finish yet, yeah?

There’s the Holiday Season that prompts assorted office parties. Yeap, from Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Day, it’s party time all the way. After New Year’s, there’s Valentine’s, fiestas of patron saints Marianas-wide, novenas, rosaries, death anniversaries, golden anniversaries, including not so golden anniversaries, All Saints. Day, All Souls Day, and, well, Everyday Is A Holiday!

Even I relish this moment for it was a form of “party time” to write about a whole parade of, well, “party time”. It must be island style, baby! Be good and have a good time! After all, we only pass through this valley once, yeah?

Strictly a personal view. John S. DelRosario Jr. is publisher of Saipan Tribune.