BBQ Boaster


Please no propane for this island boy.
A stainless steel gasser isn’t my toy.
And you won’t see Weber at my house.
You can call me a down-to-earth spouse.

No Kingsford necessary for this primitive son.
No manufactured pellets to get my grillin’ done.
The virtues of Big Green Egg are well-known.
Could even smoke meat in a tropical cyclone.

Coconuts and tangan-tangan are all I need
To get a natural barbecue up to speed.
See, I like to get down on the ground,
Down where animal spirits lurk around.

Squatting over friendly fire loosens my loins
As I char lovely, succulent tenderloins.
Ribs, fish, hot dogs, chicken and chops,
I’ve to got to say my cookout is tops.

Because as I bring in a hearty meal for family
I hear animal spirits calling out to me,
“Thank you for respecting our sacrifice.
You are where it’s at.”
Animal spirits thanked me nice.
How many grillers can say that?

Bob Coldeen (Special to the Saipan Tribune)
Bob Coldeen is a longtime TV journalist in the CNMI and is news director/reporter of KSPN 2.

Bob Coldeen (Special to the Saipan Tribune)

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