Mueller Goose tweeter misleader tales

Mother Goose rhymes have been known, recited and sung by children for more than a hundred years. We learned them from our family, friends, and illustrated books. I have revisited some for inspiration about current events. See if you can detect which original versions of Humpty Dumpty, Peter Piper, Little Tom Tucker, Little Jack Horner, Jack and Jill, Mary Had A Little Lamb, and The House That Jack Built inspired these that follow:

The House That Trumpty Built

This is about a house full of insulting lies that Trumpty built
there was a base that believed in the house that Trumpty built
an electric Fox fed bigly BS to the base that Trumpty built
the base stayed in place in the house of lies that Trumpty built
then came some detective dogs and that worried the Fox
that nurtured the one third steady base that Trumpty built
then came a wise owl who did his work without a scowl
who ignored the King’s men and their emolument King
then surfaced maidens from a world of porn all forlorn
that had milked the cash cow who had a tweeting horn
and left him nationally enquiring from midnight to morn
all alone in the house of lies that Trumpty Dumpty built
then his life long legal pals came along indicted and worn
and they all flipped on their friend from night to morn
revealing their money deals about those maidens forlorn
some spoke of Russian rubles and were found with guilt
“Fake News” revealed more about the house Trumpty built
a bare chested Russian bear who pretended to be a friend
to the house of Trumpty made him fall off a wall to his end.

David Pecker picked pockets of many business czars
made money from unpublished stories of porno stars
If Pecker did the picking inside the National Enquirer
Why is 45 in a such pickle denying that he hired her
Donald Trumpty Dumpty tweets before breakfast
what will he tweet , who will he insult, what mutter
will today’s tweets turn into a full blown rant
will he tweet when he puts down his golf putter
will he admit about stopping that he just can’t
will he ever learn to give insulting tweets a rest.
Little Trumpty Dumpty sits in a corner
crying his eyes out bawling like a baby
this adult child, a self inflicted mourner
pities himself first, piles of money maybe.
King Donny Trumpty thinks he is just great
tells you of his greatness at the drop of a hat
never mind his kingdom that can always wait
the King of Debt comes first and that is that.
Failing Trumpty Dumpty put everybody down
from his own Cabinet members to close allies
international leaders now view him as a clown
not to any beleaguered US citizens surprise.
Poor lonesome Trumpty Dumpty sitting all alone
his self flattery and batteries have run very low
with difficulty getting out insults on his cell phone
his unpopularity and lack of support continue to grow.
Donald was a King of Debt who said he had lots of bucks
everywhere that Donald went rubles were sure to flow
when deals went bad Donald said I think this sucks
so off to the Ukraine and the Seychelles his men did go
when they ultimately got caught they flipped on him
in Virginia, D.C. and the Southern District of New York
to try and stay above water he struggles, sink or swim
all the while acting like a diplomatic demagogic dork.
He sits all alone in a dysfunctional and dismal swamp
he told voters he’d drain but then he himself created more
creatures from billionaires and crooks knocking at his door
now he wishes for half the common sense of Forrest Gump.

JOEY ‘PEPE BATBON’ CONNOLLY, Special to the Saipan Tribune
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