Island Ramblings

Kudos to companies running cellular phone service seeking to eliminate charges from callers into your cell phone. It makes sense why should a customer be charged for calls he never even placed. It’s fair that such be undertaken for it would mean more business for a service that is often prohibitive because of current charges leveled against cell owners. Use of the cell phone is really important especially for women who may run into flat tires in some out of the way places, i.e., backroad or Marpi.

•••

CNN carried an interesting piece about arrogant customers in bars and restaurants where chefs and waitresses also engage in a get even warfare. For instance, a difficult customer returns his steak arrogantly complaining that it’s been cooked to near well-done when he asked for medium rare.

In fact, I saw this arrogant attitude of a certain family who came to dinner and returned every plate from the kitchen. It was a boastful attitude to impress others in the restaurant that they have some savvy or superficial sophistication like some British lord weeds. I felt sorry for the entire clan as I was sure the chef and waitresses must have spit underneath the next set of steaks and watch as the troop swallows a succulent and saliva filled steaks. Woe!

Next, I heard a Chamorro lady (product of modern day sophisticate) yelled at the waitress because the rum was too strong in her drink. A powerful drink for a rather thin lady (unless her liver is stronger than Samson’s) I wondered if after one drink too many she would be rewarded the spit (saliva) game for being obnoxious. I can almost guarantee that the bartender and waitress conspired to render unto her majesty what’s due her highness.

Advice: At a restaurant or bar, be tactful and eat or drink whatever came to your table even if it’s the wrong order or politely–read carefully now–politely ask for another dish or drink. Imagine contracting TB and all because of your boastful attitude. Woe!

•••

The recent takeover of the detention cell at DPS brought to mind the question: Can locals stand pain and suffering for a certain cause? I seriously doubt it. I found out long time ago that locals love comfort, a full stomach and hardly wary of what a cause is all about or what entails fighting for a good cause. The level of indifference to making a difference is good fodder for jokes between here and Hollywood.

Frankly, I was worried sick at the likelihood of a shootout between police officers and inmates. It was especially troubling after hearing from a family member the deathly words of a brother who told him that “death is the only way out”. I was ready to leave the premise but stayed back to see what happens then. Nothing! By 3 p.m., the inmates turned in and everybody lived happily ever after.

Inmates were hungry, thirsty, sweaty, smelly because they can’t stand the heat in the cell what with power cut off, including the telephone. Yeap! A nice warm shower, full belly and comfort is better than imitating Rambo with limited ammunition. When they came to their senses, they learned that their short stint as the feared
Rambo would land them longer terms in some federal penitentiary.

•••

A golfer asked how could he improve his putting when he’s quite a distance from the pin. I advised: “Determine the speed of the green, strength and direction of the wind, how the break plays, line-up and take one last glance at the pin, putt with the goal of coming within three-feet radius of the pin”. Convinced he could bluff others, he asked the guy next to him what’s the best way to sink more putts. Snapped his friend: “Shoot at the hole”. (Laughter).