Jeff Scores again

About a week or so ago, a friend sent me an e-mail to report on my old friend Jeff Score’s activities. “[I have] got old Jeff score again,” my friend announced.

“I was at the CHC waiting parlor with a mild case of the flu, when in walks Jeff Score with–that’s right, you guessed it–a stunning Chinese girl. He took her to the window and they left and went to another room.”

Naturally, the news came as no surprise to me, for I had seen old Jeff with some “stunning” Chinese girls before. And apart from the inherent hypocrisy in vigorously pursuing a federal takeover while simultaneously enjoying the delightful perks of a relatively open immigration system, I do not fault Jeff for his personal proclivities.

Heck, let me be the first to admit: I like Chinese women, too. I like them very much. In fact, I dated one for more than a year. And I would certainly not hesitate to do so again at the slightest opportunity.

Who knows? I may even end up breaking my friend Ed’s cardinal rule–“Never, never, ever get married”–and marry a Chinese woman at some point, depending on the stability of our relatively open immigration system and the accompanying liberal social opportunities it continues to present to diverse CNMI-based American men like old Jeff and myself.

Incidentally, let me also candidly admit that, in all my 27 years, I have never once been involved with a Chamorro woman; and, frankly, I seriously doubt that I ever will, because, for some inexplicable reasons, they don’t seem to dig the Reyes’ free market program. Which gives the federal takeover question an added social dimension.

Why indeed should the U.S. federal government arbitrarily limit the marriage/social market by cracking down hard on our liberal local immigration policies? Political and economic issues aside, there are important and legitimate social issues at stake here.

The CNMI has been blessed by the opening of its borders. The relatively free flow of people into the CNMI has enhanced the local culture and created precisely the kind of ethnic and racial diversity our Democratic detractors are all too eager to celebrate and embrace in other parts of the United States.

As for old Jeff Score, well, he is just applying Benjamin Graham’s value, bargain-hunting principles to the realm of females: acquiring beauty at a substantial discount (using less good looks) by exploring opportunities abroad, in less developed and less efficient markets, where government-induced financial distortions give rise to similar social distortions and concomitant opportunities for the value investor. In other words, he couldn’t land such “stunning” Chinese women back in the more developed social markets of the United States. Thus, opposing the US federal takeover essentially amounts to more social free trade, which–as in the financial markets–tends to benefit all parties.