What youth really needs

Growing up is really tough. A youngster has so much to learn and develop that at times he feels quite inadequate to the task of becoming a mature adult. He is bombarded from many directions. His parents correct his every move, his teachers demand performance in school, his peers require conformity in dress and thought, the mass media shouts at him about life style. However, beneath all this shoving, pushing, pulling, and cajoling, I feel that if youth receives and understands the following five common elements he will have a greater chance of reaching maturity.

AN ATTENTIVE EAR: As adults we are too prone to one way communication with young people. We know things. They don’t. Over and over children report that no one listens to them and no one understands them. With all their questions, uncertainties, insecurities, they find it difficult to find an adult who will listen to them. Listening to young people and listening attentively sends them a powerful message. Someone cares! They realize that they are being taken seriously.

INSPIRATION: When boys and girls in junior high school write on the walls: “ Life sucks; then you die.” What message are they giving us? When the media and many close adult friends of youngsters tear down heroism and respect for human potentiality, what is left for them to believe in? Wallowing in a steady diet of scandals, flawed heroes, and human deceit, is it any wonder youth becomes suspicious of life. Despite this cynicism, young people hunger for ideals and stars to guide their lives. Let’s lead them with their heads up and their eyes on the stars.

LOVE: Human beings crave love. Children cannot develop into fully mature persons without it. Much of the trouble students get into, from disruptive classroom behavior to promiscuous sex and drugs, comes down to looking for love in the wrong places. Despite that a youngster may be difficult to love because of various reasons, we must still show love to that flawed one. We must look at the image that youngster can become. As Someone put it,” Children need love especially when they do not deserve it.”

STRUCTURE: A young person without structure or organization in his life has little upon which to hang his character on. Unless we instill order, hard work, and self-discipline in our youth, how can they grow into creative, independent, self-directed and free? As a young tree needs support to grow tall so youth requires structure. It gives him a feeling of security, assurance, and balance in his life.

FRIENDSHIP: The late Ralph Tyler, an influential educator, was fond of asking his fellow educators,” Do you know why the great majority of students come to school everyday? Not out of love for learning or to please their parents and teachers. They come to school to see their friends.”

How often a despondent youngster sadly states,” Why doesn’t anyone like me?” How easy is to make scars with slurs and insults. Young people today suffer from a feeling of alienation. Who can they trust? How does one become a friend? Unfortunately they often confuse their desire to belong for friendship. As a result they often make wrong choices in the selection of “ friends.”

The best way to grasp the essence of the above comments is to fit them into your own life. How have the five common elements served you since childhood and into adulthood? It must be made clear to young people that who they are and are becoming really matters. Cynthia Ozick wrote,” What we remember from childhood we remember forever.”