A plot-less detour of the universe and beyond

The Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy; 1:43; PG, for thematic elements, action and mild language; Grade: C+

If you plan to watch The Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy, it’s important that you arrive on time. The beginning is the best part of the movie, with a terrifically funny theme song and a precious introduction to the main characters and their predicament. Moving full steam ahead at this point, it feels like we’re going to be in for a deliriously wild ride.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t take long for the momentum to slow to a crawl, as the movie devolves into a mess of sight gags and jokes loosely connected by a story that goes absolutely nowhere. Mind you, there are a number of very funny moments, so it isn’t a complete waste of time, but it could’ve been so much better if it would’ve had a more developed plot.

After a long wait, The Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy has finally been adapted to film, and it took a lot of work. Author Douglas Adams began working on the script in 1988, and after three years was still on the second draft, when he died of a heart attack. Disney handed the reigns over to Karey Kirkpatrick (Chicken Run) to finish the script. It’s not possible for me to know which parts of the script can be credited to whom, but my best guess is that Kirkpatrick made mincemeat of Adams’ work, because parts of it feel very much out of place, and very un-Adams-like (especially the forced love interest).

In The Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy, Arthur Dent (Martin Freeman, Shaun of the Dead) is having a really bad day. Still in his bathrobe, he is greeted at the top of the morning by a crew of demolishers ready to bulldoze his house. Turns out for the worse—it’s not just his house scheduled for demolition. All of Earth is about to be destroyed by the alien Vogons, to make way for an intergalactic bypass route. Lucky for Arthur, his best friend, Ford Prefect (Mos Def, The Italian Job), is actually a space alien, hitchhiking his way through the galaxy, and is more than glad to bring Arthur along.

After the setup, the movie pretty much hits a brick wall. The plot is so flimsy that I hesitate to even call it a plot. Once in space, we follow Arthur and Ford as the film wanders aimlessly all over the place, from one tangent to another. They venture to a planet that punishes original thought, help a two-faced politician retrieve one of his faces, and among other things, search for the ultimate question to life, the universe and everything (they already know the answer—they just need the question).

Through all of their endeavors, I have a difficult time pinning down a central plot that ties everything together. What is the conflict that needs to be resolved? There isn’t one. Without an actual storyline to follow, the wait-time between jokes gets tiresome.

Thankfully, many of the jokes do work out just fine. Adams’ humor is clever, irreverent, dry, sometimes off-the-wall, and much of it plays well on the big screen. Some of the funniest moments come straight from The Guide itself, an animated electronic handbook.

Both of the lead actors are good, especially Mos Def, whose acting skills easily match his talents as a rapper, both in intelligence and energy. The supporting cast is nothing to write home about, except for Alan Rickman (Harry Potter1,2 &3, Die Hard), whose voice work is terrifically understated, as Marvin, the sidekick robot who needs a serious ego boost.

The Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy is the kind of movie that will probably be better enjoyed on your TV. I’ve noticed that many people have different expectations whether watching a movie at home or the theater. When at the theater, we want the full movie experience. From this perspective, The Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy fails, without a central story to ever pull us in. At home, however, it’s a little easier to excuse a movie’s misgivings, and just enjoy whatever it has to offer. The Hitchhikers’ Guide to the Galaxy offers a few laughs here and there, and for that, it’s a passable distraction.