Privacy and Independence 2000

In the next few weeks, months or days, employees of the U.S. federal government will come knocking at your door. They will be asking you a series of sensitive questions about your private, personal, internal affairs.

They will want to know your annual household income: how much you and your loved ones gross and net each year. They will want to know how much private property you own, and whether or not you rent or own. They will want to know how many kids you have, and how many people are currently living with you at home. They will want to know how old you are, how much education you have attained, and whether you are married, single or divorced. In other words, they will be asking you questions that are really none of their gosh-darn business.

The government people in question come from the US Census Bureau. And they will no doubt tell you that these questions are of vital importance to the state. They will further assure you that your answers will be held in the strictest of confidence. (Trust them: they come from the government.)

No matter, you do not have to answer. You are under no legal obligation to answer any of their questions. You may indeed refuse to respond. They can go to the next house.

Or, alternatively, instead of answering truthfully, you may give false and misleading responses. I believe there is no penalty for lying to the government in this connection. Besides, it might be fun.

“Mr. Reyes, how much did you earn last year?”

Answer: “$8,000. I mean, make that $128,000.”

“Are you married, Mr. Reyes?”

Yes, I have three wives: one in Mainland China, one in Sakhalin Island, and one in Hawaii.

“And how many children do you have, Mr. Reyes?”

That I know about? Let me see. I would say approximately ten, maybe twelve. But certainly no more than fifteen tops.

But seriously now, folks–you do not have to answer the federal government’s questions. Politely tell these government workers to take a hike.

The US Census was created to ensure accurate democratic representation. Yet this in no way applies to the CNMI. We have no vote in Congress or the White House. No matter how much these government bureaucrats count, there will be no change in democratic representation for the CNMI; the CNMI will continue to have zero
representation. And a bunch of inquisitive government bureaucrats will not change that fact one iota. So why bother?

The only thing these Census bureaucrats will do is promote congressional pork spending, socialism, and government central planning. Why help them rob US taxpayers of their hard-earned income and assets?

Just say no to the US Census.